How To: Leaving Home

Hey guys. Today I am a mess. This is my last day in my home town before leaving for college. I think I have cried every day for the past five days just thinking about it. As I was driving through downtown this morning, this is what I was thinking.

When we are born, we begin growing our  roots. They are small at first. But, as we grow up, they get stronger and set deep into the ground.

As I drive through this place I call my home, I can see my roots. I see them extend into my house, with its white picket fence and green wooden door. I see them attach me to my sister, my brother, my mom and my dad. My roots connect me to my friends, both old and new. I am rooted in my hometown. I am secure. I am stable. I am safe.

This is why it is so hard to leave home. But, on this drive, I realized that leaving home does not mean I have to break off my roots. These roots are a part of my history. They are a part of me, even now. I will always be connected to my home.

Tomorrow, I am extending my roots. I am going somewhere new.  I will attach myself to new people and new places. These connections will be new and fragile. But, soon, they will grow stronger and stronger. It may take time, but I have to remember that I will be secure again. I will be stable again. And I will be safe again.

Hopefully this helped any of you who may be experiencing the same thing. Wish me good luck and I would love to read any of your advice, tips or thoughts on the topic. 

That's all for now.

-m

How To: Change

Change. I have never been one to be excited about change. Now, that's not to say that I like routine. But I love that comfort you get when you are really happy and safe during certain times in your life. For me, my comfort was my senior year of high school. Yes, there are always ups and downs in life. But, for me, I was completely, fully and utterly happy during my last year of high school. My friends made me happy. My school made me happy. My family made me happy. And then: change.

Next year I will go off to college. And this terrifies me. It terrifies me because why would I want change when what I have now brings me so much joy? To think that in a very short amount of time I will never live the life I have been living for 18 years now again is unbelievable.

After graduating, I wanted to do a post on change. However, I realized that I was totally unprepared to confront my feelings on moving on from my current life. I wasn't ready to deal with my emotions and overall wasn't ready to say goodbye. And, to be honest, I'm not so sure I am 100 percent there yet even as I write this now. However, I have made a lot of progress, have dealt with many of my fears and have finally accepted this change.

How I Dealt With Change

1. Tears. Many tears. I am a firm believer that a good cry can really help you release your emotions and heal, even if it's just a little bit. :)

2. Music! I have always loved listening to songs like they are a soundtrack to my life. My advice: Avoid all songs about home. I also tried to avoid songs that I listened to a lot this past year. Instead, I was drawn to songs about the future or hope, as dramatic as it sounds haha. Try to find new songs to accompany your new chapter of your life. My choices: Time Will Tell by Gregory Alan Isakov, Landslide by the Dixie Chicks, Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts, Smile by Mikky Ekko, Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves, You Get What You Give by the New Radicals, Everything Will Change and I Don't Want To Be and Chariot by Gavin DeGraw! Let yourself dissolve into the music and set your mind on the new, the future. :)

3. Appreciate the past but don't live in it. It is extremely important that you don't dwell on the past. Yes, it feels amazing to look back on what you had. Appreciate and be thankful for the "good old times." But, look to the future. Think about how you can make new memories, experience new things and meet new friends.

4. Keep yourself busy. Don't let yourself have too much alone, down time where you will probably end up sobbing over a photo album while listening to "I'll Always Remember You" by Miley Cyrus. Do anything to take your mind off of these thoughts. Be productive!

5. Live in the moment. Every second of your life is precious. So, although it is easier said than done, don't live in the past, don't worry about the future. Focus on "the now." Put all of your energy and passion into your everyday, current life. :)

And, there you have it. Of course, I'm no expert. These were what worked for me, or I guess still are working for me. Change isn't easy. The truest but hardest way to deal with change, I would say from experience, is time. So, to those of you who may be going through a difficult time in your life due to some change, please listen. I know it is hard right now. It's painful and feels like nothing will ever be better. But soon you will realize that as every day passes, the pain gets less and less and soon enough, you will find that comfort, that happiness and that security that you once had. I promise.

That's all, for now.

-m

How To: Escaping Reality

Hey there! It's a Sunday night as I write this post. I was laying on my bed, excited for a night of "Orange is the New Black," Youtube surfing and maybe even some reality t.v. All of a sudden, I felt really guilty for wanting to spend so much time on things that many people say are a waste of time, unproductive and possibly anti-social. However, after spending some time thinking about the idea, my guilt slowly went away.

A man once said...

"The story of escape." This phrase played over and over again in my head until my thoughts changed. Escaping. This is something we all need. Now, I do not mean escaping as in running away from problems. I mean a sort of break from reality. A vacation from our everyday lives where we travel into other worlds, other minds, other lives and most importantly, other stories. How can we ever learn or grow if we only focus on our own selves and situations? How can we ever cleanse our minds if we are always living in our own heads?

So, to everyone out there who calls things like Netflix, television shows, etc. a "waste of time," all I have to say to you is: you're wrong. These things have value. Of course, we cannot spend our entire lives binge watching "Gossip Girl." However, those moments where we sink into other realities, those times when we completely relate to another character or forget about the world around us, are vital.  As silly as it sounds, it can help us learn, grow, laugh and escape.

I believe escaping makes us happier and better people.

That's all, for now.

-m

How To: Finding Your Passion

Passion. This is something that drives us. That helps us wake up in the morning. That gives us a sense of meaning. That makes us happy. We all are passionate about something. Although some may have a more difficult time finding what they are passionate about, we still all have passions. For me, I always felt like this was a very scary task (to find my "passion"). Personally, I have gone through a seemingly endless amount of activities, sports and hobbies trying to find something that I could call my passion. I tried soccer (it was fun, but I was too scared of the ball), tennis (trying to serve the ball made me so frustrated), track and field (a love/hate relationship, but not my passion), guitar (making my hands do two different things at the same time was impossible)...well, you get the picture. Reflecting on my crazy adventures while trying to find my passion made me realize that a person's passion does not have to be so concrete. It can be anything really. For such a long time I was so mad at myself for not being especially good at one thing and for not having an answer to the question: what are you passionate about? How could I have an answer when it seemed as if I couldn't do or didn't especially love something? The following quote finally answered my prayers.

This quote perfectly sums up how I feel about this concept. No, I don't think I have any special talent. I'm not a star athlete or a genius student or a brilliant artist. But that doesn't mean that I don't have passions. I know that I am passionate about trying new things. I'm passionate about experiencing new places. I'm passionate about my family and friends. And, in the words of Einstein, I am "passionately curious." I don't think a person has to limit themselves to one thing or confine themselves in a box. People can be passionate about anything and everything. No matter what it is, as long as they are passionate people and put their energy, drive and emotions into everything they do, their lives have a purpose and a positive impact on the world.

That's all for now.

-M

ps. Sorry if this post is confusing (was written at a point of extreme exhaustion) ;)

How To: Confidence

Hey guys! This is the first installment of my "How To" series. Today's post is all about confidence. Although I know I touched on this subject before (in my post "Breaking Out of Your Shell"), I needed to talk a little more about this subject today. Yesterday, as I was sitting in one of my classes in the afternoon, I was zoning out a bit and thinking about how much has changed for me in the past five years or so. I couldn't put my finger on just what had caused this change (me being overall a much more confident person). However, I almost gasped (not to be dramatic) when I realized the answer. So, here we go.

How to be confident? The answer: self-worth. I'm going to be honest, I don't know if this is as mind-shattering to others as it is to me. For me, I had never recognized that realizing your self-worth was the key to confidence. So, let's go into my passionate, uplifting talk.

We ALL have value. And as much as some people seem to believe, no one is worth more as a person than anyone else. We are ALL equal. True confidence does NOT come from the validation of other people or make-up or clothes or friends. Yes, these things can BOOST our confidence. But, real confidence comes from inside ourselves. It comes from knowing that we are worthy and our opinions, thoughts and ideas are just as valuable as the opinions, thoughts and ideas of others. Knowing and truly believing this will allow you to be confident.

This may seem obvious or simple to some people. Maybe you have heard this a million times before. But I don't think that a lot of us actually believe it. If you do, that is amazing. But if you don't, know that you have value and please recognize your self-worth. :)

That's all for now.

-M